Evil Whispers

Nicolai knew that as much as he wanted to deny it, Patrick was right. He sighed and slightly turned so he was able to eye Eleanor from the corner of his eye. He then turned back to Patrick. "Perhaps you are right," he said with an agitated and hushed tone. It was most likely the monster in him that wanted to walk her alone to her quarters. At this time, he became angry with himself for letting such thoughts invade his mind. But he couldn't deny the longing to know this woman. He wanted to know more about what intrigued him so much. But it was too dangerous for her. For her own good, he would need to stay away from her. He walked back to the table.

"It seems Patrick has brought to much attention some items that I must take care of immediately. Please accept my apologies but I will not be escorting this evening. Patrick will be stepping in and will be escorting you." He paused for a moment. "It was very nice to have met you, Miss Lyndon. I'm sure you will do wonders with my son." He bowed slightly to her before taking his leave.

He glided must faster than a human towards his study. Anger only built more as he went along. He walked into his study and slammed the door, letting out a muffled growl. It was so hard to separate his desire for blood and companionship, for the monster that lives inside of him. He shook his head, why was he even thinking this? Companionship? Since when did he need that? His wife just died not too long ago. Plus, he had Patrick and William. There was no need to fill something that wasn't empty.

Eleanor blinked and forced a smile to her face.

"Of course, there's no need to apologise, you msut be very busy I'm sure. Goodnight." She said, quickly calling after him as he left. He seemed angry...oh dear lord. She sighed softly, well this household was going to be fun. She stood and smiled softly to Patrick who was looking a lot more like a good friend than a butler.

"The master sometimes has a poor memory in good company. I have not heard him laugh so much since Lady Catherine passed away." He said softly. Eleanor ducked her head.

"I am glad to have lightened his evening. Thereis no need to escort me if you have toher things to do." She added quickly. Patrick chuckled.

"Oh no miss Eleanor, there is need." He assured her before escorting her to her room.

Eleanor readied herself for bed, letting her hair fall from the many pins and slipped beneath the covers with a good book, the candle flickered and she smiled, losing herself in the world of romance and danger in Jane Eyre. She finished the capter she'd started on the journey here and put the book down, settling down into the softest bed she'd ever slept on and blew out the candle, soon in a deep sleep.

He felt an unfamiliar ache, a calling of the sorts. He paused his movement for a moment and zeroed in on the call. Softly at first, it was quiet beat. It had a rhythm to it. Her steady breathing could be heard among this rhythm that called to him. He grasped at his chest where he heart would have been if he still had one. Before he knew it, he felt his feet move towards the sound. He pushed open the door to his study and moved down the hall gracefully. He found himself moving up the stairs and down the long hall.

His breath caught in his throat when he feet stopped at her door. He closed his eyes and opened the door without a sound. He closed it softly behind him and moved towards her. Her heart beat calling for him ever so loudly. He wanted to touch her as he moved to her. Her soft lips taunted him to kiss them. He took in a long, deep breath. Her scent was so toxic to his senses. He closed his eyes, lavishing in her scent.

He opened his eyes and reached a hand to her face. He touched her ever so softly. He brought his face close to hers and kissed her lips gently. He knew that she wouldn't wake. His movements and touches were too soft to be felt. But the touch meant so much to him. He pulled away from her and leaned against the window, in the shadows, to watch her delicate body sleep.

The night Eleanor dreamed. She dreamed that she was at home, a young girl of sixteen. If her family had had any decent money or lived in the city she would have been preparing for her debut season a year or two later. But they were just a country family. They managed a Viscount's land and were trusted to do a good job of it. She laughed as she ran through a field the wind throwing her hair behind her. Her mother would have scolded her if she'd seen her, her father would have just laughed. She threw herself down onto the grass, the smile stretching her lips as dandelions waved to and fro around her. She picked one up and blew the seeds away softly, watching them dance through the air as she closed her eyes against the warm sun.

She sighed softly as a hand traced over her face and blushed when the tenderest of kisses landed on her lips. Heat flared deep within her and she let out a low cry when the touch left. She sat up, staring wildly ahead as her fingers pressed against her quivering lips. She looked to the sky and saw dark clouds rolling in, thick and heavy. Lightning struck at trees and one burst into flames. Eleanor sprang to her feet alarm spreading through her as quickly as the fire leapt from tree to tree.

Eleanor ran, no longer the carefree sixteen year old with her whole life ahead of her. She ran back to the cottage her family lived in, where the storm was at it's peak. She saw her mother, calling her from the kitchen door and pushed herself to reach her in time. But it was too late, her mother slammed the door shut. Eleanor ran into it and pulled at the handle trying desperately to open it. She heard screaming from inside, her mother, her father, her brothers and sister. She reached down and picked up a pot, throwing it through the kitchen window. eleanor climbed through the window and rushed through the house, smoke filled the air, she couldn't breathe. She fell through the fromt door and into the family plot in the church yard.

"They're all dead Eleanor, they're all gone." Her mother's voice floated around her as she stared at the names on the gravestones. Father, Arthur, Joseph and little Kate. They were all there standing over her, accusing her. Their cold, clammy hands reached for her and she drwe back with a small scream but they were faster than she was and they were pulling her down to an open grave. No matter how hard she pleaded, struggled or apologised they didn't stop. They threw her into the coffin and nailed it shut. She cried out and struck her hands against the wood as she heard the earth falling on top of her new prison.

In the new bedroom Eleanor had broken out in a sweat, small frightened noises were comnig from the back of her throat as she tossed and turned. Yet she remained in the thrall of her recurring nightmare.

Nicolai wanted so much to wake her from her obviously terrifying dream. But he couldn't, he'd have to explain why he was in her room. He inwardly cursed to himself. Biting at his lip, he lost himself in thought. Then he thought of something. He moved to her and started brushing softly at her cheek, hoping to calm her. He lightly sang a lullaby he had heard Catherine singing to William when he was just a baby.

"Sleep, my child and peace attend thee,
All through the night
Guardian angels, God will send thee,
All through the night

Soft, the drowsy hours are creeping
Hill and vale, in slumber sleeping,
I, my loving vigil keeping
All through the night. "

He smiled down at her sleeping form, hoping that his actions would help soothe the dream. He didn't like not be able to see what bothered her so.

Eleanor didn't know how much time passed as she managed to break through the wood, her hands bloody as she pulled at the splinters, soil fell down onto her face and bugs started crawling over her, she tried to bat them off but she couldn't stop them.

In her sleep Eleanor unknowingly hit at Nicolai's hand, tears rolling down her temples as she dreamt of being suffocated by the soil. She panicked, thrashing against the cofines of her wooden prison. She screamed, soft cries of terror invading the peaceful bedroom. And then the soil was filling her mouth, blocking her throat, she couldn't breathe, she felt the ache in her lungs but she couldn't do anything about it. This was it, she was going to join her family and leave her mother for the last time. With a heartbroken sob she stopped fighting and let the darkness consume her.

Eleanor woke with a gasp and sat bolt upright in the bed, she shook with fear and buried her face in her hands trying to dispell the horror of the nightmare. It had never gone so far before. She pulled back quickly and stared at her hands in the moonlight checking them for blood and splinters then touched her face and neck. She was covered in a cold sweat and she couldn't stop shivering. She didn't even notice that Nicolai was beside her as she gulped the air into her lungs and put her forehead on her knees trying to calm herself down.

Nicolai watched her in fear. He wanted her to wake from the nasty dream that had a hold on her. Too soon his wish was answered.Nicolai froze, he hadn't left yet and he couldn't, not now. He simply watched her with concerned eyes.

He kept quiet, he had no idea what to do or what she'd say. His own lips trembled. As he kept his eyes on her. He gave her these moments to herself. Her dream had obviously shaken her up. And as much as he wanted to hold and comfort her, he couldn't. Not without her permission.

Eleanor clenched her teeth. She was living, she was breathing. She wasn't suffocating and there was nothing to be guilty for, not the deaths of her families, they'd all been accidents, her father had died of heart failure. She had to get a grip on herself. Maybe if she went down to the kitchens and had a glass of water or something she'd feel better. Yes that's probably what she needed...or a stiff drink. She wished she had her mother to hold her and chase the horible memories with their lullaby. Yes she was a grown woman now, but she felt old before her time. It was nice to be looked after sometimes. She sighed softly and reached out to her bedside table for the candle.

But her hand didn't quite get there as it knocked against something soft, yet solid. She froze for half a second before looking up over her shoulder and screamed when she saw the shadow looming over her.

Nicolai eyes widen as he stepped out of the shadows. He held a finger to his lips. "Shhh. It's just me, don't scream you're gonna wake everyone up." He said looking at her. He removed his finger and frowned. He should have left. Now, damn it, he cursed to himself once again. This wasn't going to look good to her at all. He didn't know how to explain why he was in her room for. Perhaps he was checking on William and heard her thrashing about. It's all he had as an excuse.

Eleanor stopped screaming and gasped, her hand pressed against her madly beating heart.

"My lord?" She asked, it sounded like him but why was he in her room? She reached out, taking care not to hit him again, and fumbled with the candle trying to light it but her fingers were shaking too much and she couldn't keep hold of the flint. She gave up on the candle and reached across her bed for her dressing gown and pulled it on over her nightgown, she couldn't let her employer see her in such a state of undress! It was bad enough that he'd witnessed her nightmare.

Eleanor tied the gown quickly at the waist and stood, she felt..odd sitting on hte bed talking with the Lord and at least she'd be able to use the moonlight to see him.

"I beg your pardon my lord...but what are you doing in my bedroom?" She had to ask it.

Nicolai stayed calm. He eyed her softly keeping his distance. "I was simply checking on William when I heard you thrashing about. It worried me so I entered hoping nothing was wrong. I had only been here a moment before you woke." He said lying smoothly.

Eleanor's cheeks flushed and she blinked.

"Oh..I...apologise I didn't mean to cause you to worry...it was a silly nightmare, nothing more." She murmured turning away slightly wishing she could lay her forehead against the cool glass, but then she'd appear more fragile than she actually was. She had to be strong and resilient as a governess and it wouldn't do to lose the mentality while she was in the house, or even out of it.

It would lend for an odd life but there was nothing for it. She had to remain professional.

"No need to apologize, m'lady. I shouldn't have entered your chambers. I should be apologizing," he said offering an apologetic smile. He watched her silently for a moment before speaking again. "Shall I have Patrick bring you some refreshments?" He asked not knowing if she'd like a glass of water or anything to that nature.

Eleanor glanced away at his question and shook her head.

"No thank you I should be fine." She murmured, not wanting to put her new master out anymore than she already had. "Sir, there's no need to apologise, it's a perfectly reasonable...thing to happen." She cleared her throat gently. If there had been anyone other than the family in the house, and even then it would be awkward if any of the servants had been witness to the event, then it would have been undoubtedly embarrassing and horrifying and she'd have to give up her station immediately.

"I'm sorry to cause you worry but thank you for coming in to check on me. Is William alright?" She asked, glancing up at him, her eyes clearer as her mind fixated on that one point. At last, a safe topic. In her bedroom which was so not a safe environment for the two of them.

Nicolai nodded to her before thinking of her question.

"He is to be expected. We are not on speak terms it seems. But he will soon get over it," he answered. He started towards the door.

"I understand you think I have no reason to apologize but I am still sorry. Perhaps next time I will send in a female servant," he offered. "I hope you sleep well, Ms. Landon." He opened her door and left her to slumber. He couldn't allow himself to be caught in her room again like that. He took a deep breath made his way down to his own chambers.